Archive for May, 2013


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Ghost

I walk the streets by day
To strengthen my broken body
I pace my room at night
To try to think myself right

Once in a while
I get trapped in the past
Stalked by childhood demons
They hold me in their grasp

I am a ghost in the day time
A shadow at night
I want shine for you
But you turn from my sight

Fuelled with coffee and red wine
My flag is unfurled
What would become of me?
Without your love sweet girl

This dialect and imagery
Reminds me of you and I
They fit together so well you see
But they don’t always rhyme

I am a ghost in the day time
A shadow in the night
I want to shine for you
But you turn from my sight

My insecurity
Can wash me out to sea
Strong hands that silence me
Passers-by that never see

Mothers that never hear
Fathers that never ask
Children that never say
Just dread another day

I am a ghost in the day time
A shadow in the night
I want to shine for you
But you turn from my sight

I am a ghost in the day time
A shadow in the night
But all this would fade away
If you just hold me tight

© 2013 by Peter Anstiss

Written as a lyric, ‘Ghost’ is part of the Comeback Kid collection. As a song or a poem I am pleased with the emotion it captures. It is about past and present pain. What happens when those two things collide? It hints at the importance of having a coping mechanism to handle emotional crisis.

Even the strongest people have breaking points, such as painful memories and physical trauma. These can leave skeletons in our lives that have a horrible habit of tumbling from whence we have stuffed them at the most inconvenient time. Sometimes you don’t even know where the emotion comes from. Sometimes you do, but still can’t face it. That’s when you become a ghost! When I’m a ghost I walk, I run, I pace and when I am feeling brave, I confront.


Image

Armed with my ink
I think I am invincible
That my words can tell a tale of love
Can speak a truth and be eternal

Is that why I write?
To be trawled forever on an Internet site
So I might remain immortal on the page
My word’s to remain timeless and never age

It is the reader, not the writer
Who decides the writers plight
Whether the seeds of words he sows
Into something lasting grows

© 2013 by Peter Anstiss


The Forever Man

wall

This is the wall where we kissed

Those are the lips I will always miss

That was the time I learned how to love

First moments of happiness that will never be lost

Could never be lost

There were promises that I made

I meant to keep, just couldn’t keep

But I meant the love that I gave

I wanted to be your forever man

But alone I could not stand

A waiting curve that’s just too steep

I am nothing but worry, I just couldn’t sleep

All those secrets that I keep came back to haunt me

How can I compete?

With all the new people you will meet

Renewed by love, but not quite enough

I wanted to stay, but I was not that tough

Your world always seemed just beyond me

It was not that you ever wronged me

 I just could never let you see

How desperate the need was in me

These were the lips

That said the words

That sang the songs

That broke your heart

That drove us apart

From a time when choices

Seemed so clear

I could not speak

My words of fear

Too young to understand it didn’t matter

I could not outgrow a childhood shattered

I could not wait for you and escape from sin

I was your forever man, but I could never win

I was your forever man

I was hamstrung by feelings I didn’t understand

I don’t need you to forgive

I needed to run, just to live

But there are things I would’ve liked to say

But they only matter to me anyway

I am still your forever man

Even if it’s a gone forever man

© 2013 by Peter Anstiss


 

Who poo’s in a Library?

Let me ask you this

What sort of person shook it out?

Who is that sick?

 

Who poo’s in a Library?

No one, you would hope

But it’s there in all its glory

Lurking by religion and philosophy

 

Not a dog!

We are not that remiss

Not a child!

They don’t make children that big

 

I could check the CCTV

But there is not enough

Time in the day for me

To see who poo’s in a Library?

 

So I adorn the human spillage kit

Holding my breath, I muse

This is what we all do in the end

Clean up other people’s sh*t

 

 

© 2013 by Peter Anstiss


Pete Scribes

Love and hate: Lesson one

I am always afraid
Since he hunted me down
Stripped me of my innocence
Robbed me of my pride
I want to grow beyond that
But I can’t escape his shadow
It is a wound that won’t heal
That’s why I am here

You really want to do this?
I nod,
Very well he says…
I see his doubt but…
I need this strength
I need this purpose
I have been afraid so long
I will die, if I can’t shake myself free

‘Love!’
He wrote the letters on each finger
You will love your left hand
Your jab will keep your opponent at bay
Love, will protect you when others try to make hay
Love with your left
It will pave the way for hate

Hate!
He wrote the letters on each finger
Everybody must fear your hate
Whenever you throw hate
It must…

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I know you

I know you

You lived down my street

You went to my school

You were young and almost pretty

Now you’re a girl with hollow eyes

And ravaged skin you laugh

But it sounds like a lie

Alive but no one left within

We kissed once under a willow

But it was nothing much

We barely touched

You were all smiles and no sorrow

Bad things happened

In that place where we lived

Your parents should’ve worried about other things

Not that innocent kiss

Did what happened to me?

Happen to you!

They made me a ghost too

But I came back, so could you

I look into your eyes

And know that’s not true

I knew you

But you’re gone